Traditionally a baby shower was
something that was the domain of women. An expectant mother would be surprised
by her closest female friends with a party ahead of the arrival of the baby.
Typically, the friends would rally round to buy gifts and come up with plans to
support and help the mother ahead of what is obviously a significant life event
for her. These events were nearly always reserved for women as it has only been
in recent times that men have become involved in childbirth in a way any more
meaningful than being present at conception. As a result of this it transpires
that there are very few men who have ever actually attended a baby shower which
in turn means that there are often men very much out of their comfort zone when
they are invited to one. If this is you, here are a few tips on what to expect
and how to behave – remember it’s a long way removed from a bachelor party!
Take a gift
It is very much expected that you take a
gift when you go to a baby shower. This is a not a fancy gift like you would
take to a wedding or a birthday, rather the expectation is for something more
practical. Nappies are commonly gifted as are wet wipes. Certainly not the sort
of thing that you would ever want to receive. The reality is that the best baby gifts are
practical, and it can certainly be said that no expecting parent has ever been
gifted more diapers than they can use – newborn babies go through them at a
rapid rate.
Showers are a place to behave. The guest
of honour is the mother to be and given that she is pregnant, and therefore not
able to drink, it would be bad form to overindulge in front of her. Quite
simply showers are sensible places where you would behave as if you were in the
presence of children – even if the arrival of the child has not yet happened.
While you can certainly have a glass of something, nobody expects that it is a
tea only affair, the correct protocol is simply not to have too much.
Offer to help
Aside from the giving of somewhat
practical gifts, one of the other key things that happen at a shower is
volunteering to help the soon to be parents with things like meals and
babysitting. Adapting to life with a new person can be quite stressful – there
are plenty of sleepless nights and lots of new moments. It is not necessarily
fraught, but it certainly isn’t easy. So, volunteering to prepare a meal for
the new couple can go a long way to help the couple settle in and become
accustomed to their new reality. Being a parent certainly gets easier with
time, you are just helping in the very early days.
There will be
games
Plan to watch some games. Nothing saucy
or risqué, rather some fun games that will speak to the ability of the couple
to parent. They will be true or false games and things that involve baby nappies. Maybe some guessing
games around the baby’s name or its future prospects. Innocent fun, a world
away from the sort of thing that lads expect to engage in at bachelors – but
don’t be disappointed, your turn will come.
